Returning Reflections- Valpo

As my time of returning to Valpo is passing midway and approaching the end I find myself reflecting and contemplating on Valpo, my time here as an undergraduate and my time here now. Much has stayed the same since graduating, and much has changed.

One thing that has stayed the same, and probably will always be the same is my love of the place. The happy memories, the friends, the chapel, Christ College, the strong values and unique perspective on the world. Valpo was the place in which I truly learned who I am and came into my own. I moved out from under the shadow of teachers and parents and truly stood up for the first time as myself. There were many triumphs, and many failures, joys and depressions, yet I would not trade any of it for the world.

When I came back I expected to find many people that I knew, many friends, but I found something different, a community of people I barely knew. I found out on returning that so many of my friends, so many of my loved ones either graduated with me, or before me. There are of course some people left, but far fewer than I realized. And now in the midst of new faces I see ghosts of the past, of times when I was first learning to live on my own, learning to be a college student, my first all nighter. Valpo is a place of living ghosts, even while new memories are made and present joys are experienced I find the ghosts of the past. I sit in the library commons in the wonderful orange chairs staring out into the snow and feel such ecstasy, all the time remembering the activities fairs, the church voc meetings, the midnight strolls gazing up into the sky wishing for things that never will be. What a haunted ecstasy!

Valpo is not the same place. The old union is closed, the new union is open. It is a massive place of modern design and immaculate sterilness. I am sure it will be great and students will love it, but it is not my Valpo, it is not the dim and dark corners of worn out benches and stained carpet, much loved crevices of solitude, or of intimacy. Valpo is different and yet the same.

And the people are different, those individuals who made my time at Valpo so wonderful are changing. Friends are moving on, getting married, off to different parts of the world, and all things are different, and yet there is still a deep nostalgia, a deep love that unites us together in past shared experiences, unites us in love for Valpo.

I can never return to my Valpo. The place has changed, the people have changed, and no matter how wonderful the times were that place is gone. Returning reminds me of those things, and brings a warmth to my heart, but I am no fool. I know that these feelings are fleeting and cannot be held onto, that I must move on with my life, not living in the past, but living in a way that reflects the past.

Father, may I live in a way which reflects my time at Valpo, a life of love and service, a life of uniting faith and knowledge, of acting in ways that reflect belief and as a shining beacon in a world of darkness. 'In luce tua videmus lucem' In thy Light we see light. May I ever live in the Light and let my life be a reflection of the Light. May I live a life worthy of the ideals of Valpo, one in which the Light effects all aspects of my being and that I may be a city on a hill, the salt of the earth, a true disciple of Christ. Amen